Unsent Letters • 01.18.2019 • Because It Should Actually Matter

Disclaimer : I’ve been going through it lately. This is my place to vent out what’s been left here to poison my soul..

My Love, 

   It’s almost midnight already;  you’ve been asleep for a few – I wish I could fall asleep as fast as you can. As always, sleep eludes me and I’m laying in bed with my thoughts. 

   Things have been a little easier between us this week. I’m not sure why, but I am grateful for the repreave. Our day to day lives have grown exhausting throughout this past year and I am tired.. The struggle to remain here has become more than I can do nowadays, and I kinda feel like maybe I’m starting to get over it..

Ouch.

It’s just that a good week with you can leave me hoping for more, but I’m scared it won’t last very long.

Nothing good lasts forever anymore. Not like it should…

I have an Aunt and Uncle, (they’re actually my Mom’s aunt and uncle, but you’ve met them) who’ve been together some 67 years (or close to it). They found each other as teenagers, married young and went on to live a lifetime raising children and falling in love with each other again and again. It’s beautiful. I can’t imagine what it feels like to be loved like that, but I’ll bet it’s kinda wonderful.

I used to believe we’d have a story like that; one filled with laughter and kisses and that something the world would remember us by.

Maybe we will. I wish I had faith to move mountains, but I just don’t anymore. It’s so sad..

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