Who Is This Girl??

​This is Makayla (there in the middle) with Gracie (on the right) and Bri (on the left) making videos with an app called Musical.ly. It’s the new thing these days, I guess. Makayla spends hours in her bedroom singing and dancing with herself while making these videos. I love them. This is who she is when she’s alone. I don’t know this girl, but I’d like to. 

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She is talented and beautiful and changing so damn fast. I wish I knew this girl..this side of her..the side she keeps to herself. 

2016 has been a year of change. More change than I’m used to. The kids are growing up and becoming strangers. In so many ways I hardly know them anymore. The twins are both living full time at their momma’s house, Autumn is on the verge of moving out into her first apartment and starting community college, and Makayla, she’s an enigma at this point. 

Gone is the little girl I once knew, and in her place is this crabby, smart-mouthed teenager that I don’t know and honestly don’t like very much. When did this happen? Six months ago she still wore glasses and had braces and wanted me to do her laundry. Nowadays it’s a federal offense to open her door without knocking. 

What happened? When did I become the enemy? If you count the twins (and believe me, they spent enough time with me to count), this will be the fourth child to mutate into teenager-ism under my watchful mom-eyes. Where did I go wrong?

The twins, thank goodness, came with their own mother so there was someone to fall back on when I was in over my head. And Autumn has a long time stepmom, so there’s been constant support there as well. I don’t have these luxuries when it comes to Makayla. I wish I did. 

Makayla’s “father” (the sperm donor, as she likes to call him) lives in San Diego, California and has chosen not to be an active participant in her every day life. She turned six during the last summer she spent with him and he has no idea who she is anymore. Dratton does the best he can, but she’s never been all that receptive to his role as her stepdad. She says she has me, and that’s enough. 

It’s funny, but despite her incessant attitude and the enormous chip on her shoulder, if you were to ask any of our other children they would probably tell you Makayla is my favorite. 

Wonders never cease….

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